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literature by ichbinpeyton

writing by DJChocolate-Lover

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Submitted on
October 1, 2011
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Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
The way towards the tower covered always by mist, cold, dark, accompanied by hidden whispers and tangled in between the branches of the night trees: an owl taking flight, the tree branches as voracious claws, whiny wolves and beasts…  If you passed by sometime, the warm blood that goes through your veins would freeze, the ghosts that you hold inside you, those ones that you have locked up somewhere, would come out to devour you; only the dying yells will stay.

At the end of the world, there she was, inside, locked up.

The tower hold itself up over the trees, it was lost in between gray clouds and white snow. That turret was impossible. How could such a shapeless and demolished thing keep itself standing up?

She… that unfortunate girl that was kept captive in the damn tower, had forgotten already the years that she had been accumulating with time, despite, even, of being unanimous witness of change: the body of a girl a few months old, growing up to become a beautiful girl of copper hair and night eyes, black as a no-moon night, as that abandoned and away-from-everything corner. One night, when she was a kid and played with her fingers, something filtered into her blue eyes, something held her up several days with her eyes shut, trembling with fear in a corner, so alone there inside, so naked… she didn't notice, there weren't any mirrors, she had never seen herself, but that night her eyes changed their color, they darkened, and she could never unpick that fear from her skin.

May it be enough to say that she had never got out of there, she would never see that real world that, when unfolded, it stayed so far away from the palms of her hands…

The world that she knew was a round room that occupied all the diameter of the tower; there was no door to escape through to another place. The windows, deep, and protected by the grids, barely let the light in. There was only one thing similar to a door: a window, huge, the only one that had no bars, the only one that fed her hope, the only one that didn't condemned her; it started soil to root and ended up in the roof, that one that sometimes leaked the rainwater.

The rainy nights she forgot the fear, she whispered to herself, and in between the darkness of the night and some confusing tears, she tumbled to the floor and let the miserable leaks cover her in water kisses and soak her in peace. Those cold drops told her stories of a world outside her tower, higher, colder, closer to the sun she had never seen, the mist, that perpetual mist always surrounding her tower.

Many times she talked to herself, there was no one to listen to her, only the cold and mute rocks, the flaccid and deaf bead… Sometimes mom came to keep her company! and to take her food or clothes. She sat with her on her bed and hugged her. That morning mom came earlier than usual:

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel,
Let down your hair to me."

She gets up from her bed, and lifts up her braided hair throughout the biggest window.

Mom's flabby and wrinkled body climbed up the tower with more difficulty each time.  One morning she brought a doll in between her hands, bald, with hollow eyes, off-color lips and shreds as a dress. Until then she had played with her fingers to be a mother, she also had mimicked with both hands those stories that mom told her. There wasn't anything else, nothing else.

Rappunzel, remembers her small hands and her legs not as large as now, she remembers the dream of having something to play with. She remembers those empty afternoons, when mom told her goodbye with a smile, leaving her alone with that doll that past a few years she had come to hate.

One night, I won't say she looked at the Moon, since she got tired of her a long time ago, she hated it with resignation and submission, the Moon was the only constant in her nights, the only thing that had been with her always. Full of rancor, she would have wanted to poison the celestial body with her sadness, with that dark wish that flooded her thought every night, since quite some time now. They dreamt with her red liquid spilling out, going out through every hole in her body. But the night we are referring to she woke up before dawn, she poked out the window and she looked. There were the perpetual clouds that didn't let her see the world.

She tied the end of her braid to one of many bars and, before being free, she turned that dirty braid around her neck, to be warm and to be hugged.

She threw herself out the window. She flew, for an instant. She extended her arms and she was free.

A burst of laughter was heard throughout all of the woods before her head brutally hit the same tower that had kept her captive; it wouldn't let her get away so easily. The blood sprouted from the lower part of her skull but she was dead already, she didn't breath anymore, she didn't beat anymore. The tower's captive's feet rested a few centimeters from the ground, hanging. Rappunzel could never get to the world.

And that way, the night went on.

No one ever got close to that place. I'm lying … There was an old lady that traveled the whole route to the turret every day, that day wouldn't be different.

Rappunzel's body had dripped all night; her lips had become purple, her skin yellowish, her blue and open eyes now blurred. The sound of every drop of blood that fell towards the puddle could be heard throughout all of the forest, given the fact that nothing inhabited that place, not even the girl of the shapeless tower now.

The old woman arrived and watched in amazement Rappunzel's hanged body, but wasn't able to see that strange girl, standing on the floor, hugging Rappunzel's feet. Shaking, terrified and lonely as always.

People tell, that her mortal remains are still there, docile, slaves, the tower still grasping on her, it has made the ivy grow around her body so no one can take her from it.

And there was no prince, nor tears, only silence.

    Rapunzel's Death

                        The End

Original in spanish: [link]

Translated by: :iconnuevefactorial: Many thanks :tighthug:

:iconflowerheartplz: My Daily Deviation => Mud: [link]

:writersblock: Rapunzel's Death...... [link]

:raincloud: Peter Pan's Death.... [link]

:liquisoft: The River Styx.... [link]

:heart: Do it!: [link]

:iconflailrageplz: Fuck my heart: [link]

:shakefish: It was raining => [link]

:clap: Yami=> [link]
Yami Yami [1]

The metal edge brushed her pale cheek. She sat on the floor, naked, with legs tucked to one side, the Kimono poured over her back, and he looks at her. Her lips smeared, her black eyes and the hair on both sides of her face as black clouds, levelling the horizon of a pale sunset.

- Are not you going to beg for your life? - He asked standing before her, clutching the katana in one hand.

She blinked, and a sweet smile appears on those red lips that had kissed him minutes before.

- Speak up! - The momentum of the scream shakes his wrist and the edge of metal licks voraciously at the cheek of the naked woman, with bent back and purpl

Shh... [link]
Shh... Her breath lethargic, so weak in my arms. Her tears kiss my torso, the golden locks of her hair caress my arms, my fingertips.

She hugs her knees, curled up on herself, while I in turn, hold her in silence. I'm a jerk, I'm insensitive, I can't say anything, I can't offer any single word. And I think: "The silence and nothing more. That I offer to you, and you know, that is why you are here."

And if she breaks in my arms? No, definitely I didn't utter a single word; just moments ago her tears were a desperate flood, whining incessantly, making my body her warm den. Now it has calmed down, her bright black eyes are red, lost, looking out the

1 - Ursula - The Master => [link]
1 - Ursula The thick and heavy chains are adjusted, so unnecessary, so useless ... pressing his pale skin.

" Every night the same thing, every damn night, Ursula! Why? Why do you chain me? You know I'm not leaving!"

"You did once." is the cold, whispered reply.

He sighs. Hurt, disappointed, his gaze plunges to the ground.
"How much longer are you going to keep punishing me for it?"

"I am not the one that punished you." The reply so icy that it would freeze him if he still retained his body heat. "This is your destiny".

And with this last whisper the voice of the beautiful doll-like blonde with the perfect curls, trembles with excitement, enjoying

2- Xandros - The Vampire - [link]
2- Xandros - The Vampire Beyond the sturdy wooden windows, sealed at every crack and crevice against any sharp and slippery solar fingers that might attempt to enter the dark chamber, the greedy gold monster started rising high into the sky.

Ursula slept peacefully beside him, but the day did not pass as normal. The hallways whispered busily, full of steps that seemed to roar behind the hermetic door. They stole her dreams several times until, filled with rage, she gets off the vampire's body, to walk toward the door, beginning to lose her nerve. She falls headlong on the ground after her first steps, the ankle chain not giving her any more than it gave the vampire,


Is licensed under a Creative Commons. Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0) => [link]

¢rónι¢αѕ ∂є ∂íαѕ ℓℓυνισѕσѕ => [[link]

Original: Rapónchigo / Rapunzel / Rabanilla / Verdezuela / Melisa / Petroccinella, Writed By Wilhelm Y Jacob Grimm

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RimmiRose138 Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013
To me, this version of Rapunzel seems much more fitting than the happy-go-lucky tales of "happily ever after". It's gorgeously tragic ending was so serene and final, it's like the snow tinted red below the poor girl; sickly-sweet and chilling. Wonderful job! 
Miso-Shi Featured By Owner May 23, 2013  Student Writer
I'm not very familiar with your work, however, this is my opinion. :)

I'm not really the type to focus on the sadness in classic Disney stories, but I liked the way you wrote this. You can imagine how sad she would have been being stuck in a room alone without any physical interaction with the real world or other humans like her. I think you captured that well. I thought it was interesting the way you conveyed her perspective. Overall, I think you have a great imagery (as the previous commenter stated) and did quite well.
lluviosa Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2013  Professional Writer
Comments like this make me really happy. I'm so honored for your words, your time.... Thank you so much for read mi story with every beat of your heart.

I hope with all my heart, find your comments with my stories.
Miso-Shi Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2013  Student Writer
You're very welcome, dear! :)
nightshade-keyblade Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You are very skilled at imagery. My favourite parts were the end and the part where Rapunzel talks about the moon. Even though I can tell it is translated, there is such a beautiful quality to the original language.

¡Bien hecho!
lluviosa Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2012  Professional Writer
The end it's was really tragic, but by my point of view very necesary. For me, Rapunzel is a tragic character, all her life in this tower, poor child. =(
I write better in spanish than in english. :clap: it's not the same write than translate. =(

Thank you so much for your time! I'm really honored.
nightshade-keyblade Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Yes, that's true.

I thought so, but it is still well written in both languages.

You're welcome, it was my pleasure! :pat:
BlackLuna Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I liked more this version of Rapunzel. And I'm thinking in rewriting that story as well. Thanks for inspiring me. :)
lluviosa Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2012  Professional Writer
Thank you so much for your time :tighthug: It was an honor to awaken your inspiration.
BlackLuna Featured By Owner May 2, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Here it is the raw version: [link] :)
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